Here they are, due to popular demand!
By Matt Conant & Stephanie Yuhas, a parody of “Piece of Me” by Britney Spears.
(intro chicken noises)
(Oh yeah…) (Oh yeah…)
Verse 1:
I’m Miss Steak and Kidney Pie, since I was only 5,
Don’t matter if I’m in Dairy Queen,
I’d order beef on my ice cream,
I sprinkled pork rinds on the chocolate cake for my sweet sixteen,
You want a piece of meat?
You want a piece of meat!
I’m The Mad Cow Disease Mama
I’m Miss Salmonella-rama,
I guess I can’t see the harm
In eating barbecued llama
And with a kid on my arm, I’m still an exceptional butcher.
You want a piece of meat?
Refrain 1:
I’m Mrs. ‘I don’t care if I get gaseous’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Oh my God that murdering fascist’
(You want a piece of meat!)
I’m Mrs. ‘Extra, textured, delicious skin’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Leave the fat and gristle in’
(You want a piece of meat?)
(additional chicken noises)
Verse 2:
I’m Mrs. ‘You want a piece of meat?’
Fryin’ and grillin’ my dogs,
Unless you’re in line with vegans
Then help me tear this thigh off,
They hope I’ll take to eating plants and seeds
And things without parents.
Now are you sure you want a piece of meat?
You want a piece of meat.
I’m Mrs. ‘Most Likely to Go On Safari To Find Something To Eat,’
Taking down hippos for the ass,
Giraffes for the neck meat.
No wonder there’s so many endangered species, I mean please.
Do you want a piece of meat?
Refrain 2:
I’m Mrs. ‘I don’t care if I get gaseous’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Oh my God that murdering fascist’
(You want a piece of meat!)
I’m Mrs. ‘Extra, textured, delicious skin’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Leave the fat and gristle in’
(You want a piece of meat?)
Verse 3:
Went to Brazilian buffet, got kicked out yesterday
Had asked for some harp seal for protein,
And that fetus thing they eat in the Philippines
God hasn’t made a creature I wouldn’t devour with some franks and beans,
You want a piece of meat?
You want a piece piece of meat… meat…. meat…
You want a piece of meat? ….meat
Refrain 3:
I’m Mrs. ‘I don’t care if I get gaseous’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Oh my God that murdering fascist’
(You want a piece of meat!)
I’m Mrs. ‘Extra, textured, delicious skin’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I hear that human tastes just like chicken.
(You want a piece of meat?)
((Large quantity of chicken noises))
Refrain 4:
I’m Mrs. ‘I don’t care if I get gaseous’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Oh my God that murdering fascist’
(You want a piece of meat!)
I’m Mrs. ‘Extra, textured, delicious skin’
(MALE VOCAL: You want a piece of meat)
I’m Mrs. ‘Human tastes just like chicken.’
(You want a piece of meat?)
You want a piece of meat
You want a piece of meat… meat
Oh, yeah. Oh. Oh, yeah.
UH.